I watched the replay of Ms. Universe 2006, held in the global hegemonic USA, in Los Angeles. All beautiful women, fitting the standards of the 'thankyou doc' beauty industry. The small waistline that was rare before --and owned by a select few like wonder woman Linda Carter-- is now a common thing; high noses, cheeks-skin-legs in wood varnish finish, most candidates speaking in English with accents spiced up with native tongue slur. Different nations but same built and walk and poise.
Ms. Universe is supposed to be about representing one's country and nationality but here we are watching a bunch of beauties with relatively different origins but something tells you they all went through the same beauty global business machinery. Wide smile lips, eyes wide open, long -thin arms and legs.
It is bothering that candidates are too thin for comfort. I think I saw someone about to faint! Where were the Gloria Diaz days when contestants were genuinely bubly and alive?!
Where were the days beauties were representative of their people's natural features? More than half of the contestants have obviously mixed with the conquistadores bloods. Ms. India, Ms. Argentina and the likes look more like Farah Fawcett than native beauties!
Carson of Queer Eye for the Straight Guy, features as one of the hosts, overshadowing his partner host, a former Ms. Universe-USA. Carson, noticing the the contestants' hairs even commented that there are so many contestants with blond hair. Lots of Farah Fawcetts in the bunch.
Bikini hypno
Okay, the bikini portion parade of bodies with only the suso and pekpek covered was so hypnotic it made me stop thinking. Top that with a barrage of corporate sponsors-- Skin White (especially for black and brown skins!), Fitness (or thinness) from Nestle, Xenical weight loss, Cover Girl make up.
Bland
The stage design and the evening gown colors are just so bland, like food without garnish. Kulang sa asin, sili at bawang! Tastes of the shwe-shwe ruled the night. Boring... Hmm.. no wonder, my friend just told me the gowns, just like the swimwears, come from one designer. Monopoly spares no design.
Origins
I decided to look up Ms. Universe's origins and it says, shortly in one paragraph, that the beauty contest originated from a "bathing suit" contest in Long Beach, California spearheaded by Catalina Swimwear. Ms. Universe is all about swimwear and bodies, that fuzz about humanitarian service is an add on to give the contest a diplomatic flavor. The one-para history did not indicate the year of that Long Beach contest. It did not trace how this bathing suit contest became a global addiction.
Q andA
Eventually, the top five finalists were USA, Switzerland, Japan, Paraguay, Puerto Rico and Japan. Each contestant plus Ms U 2005 wrote a question in pieces of paper raffled in bowl.
Switzerland answered something about the importance of not losing one's family. USA answered that her desire to always do something, to help, correct and get disappointed with herself if she fails is perhaps one of her biggest flaws. Japan said something very intelligent, she spoke against violence and the male tendency for it. I forgot what Paraguay said. Puerto Rico, whose question was from Ms U 2005, defined success as achieving one's goals and that obstacles make you stronger.
Puerto Rico bagged the prize. The girl with the overused answer to the simpleton question won. So that is it. Do not expect something deeper in purpose. Latina beauty pageant schools know this. Ms U is a parade of women vying to be the ideal that the beauty and glamour mega industries dictate. Do not go for deeper transformative service, especially now that nation-states are in war. Do not even speak against any sort of violence. You can be beautiful and self-mutilate all you want, but never be too intelligently provocative. That is the way to win the pageant.
Duh- duh- duh- dumb.
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P.s. Our very own Ms Philippines won Ms Photogenic. Thanks so much to online voting that empowers us text and internet savvy Filipinos. Trunezz!
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